Building Professional Relationships Through Remote Work: Mastering the Virtual Watercooler

Traditional networking advice can often prove ineffective in the virtual world. Gone are the days of chance encounters by the office watercooler or impromptu lunch invitations. The casual “How was your weekend?” as you pass a coworker’s desk has been replaced by scheduled video calls and carefully crafted messages.

Virtual and remote work environments encourage us to rethink how we connect with our colleagues, maintain meaningful professional relationships, build trust, and encourage collaboration. Establishing professional relationships virtually comes with challenges that don’t exist in face-to-face interactions. But it also presents opportunities to foster deeper connections.

Understanding how different personality types approach virtual work communication can help us navigate these challenges and capitalize on the unique opportunities for connection in the digital workspace.

This article explores how different personality Roles can add to their strengths to build meaningful professional relationships in remote work environments.

Rethinking Personality in the Age of Remote Work

As many remote workers have discovered, the way that our personalities translate from the physical world to the virtual world can vary widely, depending on the personality type.

The virtual world has a way of reshuffling the deck, sometimes revealing hidden strengths or unexpected challenges in our personality traits.

As a result, work culture and professional expectations have been evolving to accommodate this reality, requiring greater flexibility and understanding in how we evaluate collaboration and performance.

This has led to the emergence of what we might call “digital personalities.” Many remote workers have found themselves wondering whether their online persona is the same as who they are in person. The answer, for many of us, is not a simple yes or no.

The key is to understand that a digital personality isn’t separate from a person’s true self – it’s just another aspect of who they are. By understanding how our virtual work environment impacts our natural tendencies, we can learn to adapt and leverage our strengths in new ways.

Let’s explore what each of the four personality Roles – Analysts, Diplomats, Sentinels, and Explorers – can do to develop flourishing professional relationships through remote work.

Analysts: Embracing Emotion in the Land of Logic

The Analyst Role includes INTJ (Architect), INTP (Logician), ENTJ (Commander), and ENTP (Debater) personality types. Analysts share the Intuitive and Thinking personality traits.

For Analysts, remote work may seem like a dream come true. These personalities often appreciate the structured nature of virtual collaboration, where meetings can have clear agendas and data drives decisions. Whether through written channels, video conferencing, or phone calls, Analysts tend to prefer precision and clarity.

However, with all that digital communication, Analysts may find that their logical approach needs a dash of emotional intelligence for them to truly thrive. In remote work, the absence of in-person cues makes it easier for misunderstandings to occur.

A straightforward written message that an Analyst considers clear and efficient might come across as blunt or even rude to others. While video calls can allow remote workers to see facial expressions and hear tone of voice, technical issues like lag, poor video quality, or muffled audio can distort subtle expressions and vocal inflections. For Analysts, who may not be in the habit of paying close attention to emotional cues, the digital barrier can make it even more challenging to convey and interpret emotional nuances effectively.

This issue can have both immediate and lasting effects. In the short term, it may cause misunderstandings and strain relationships. Over time – if left unaddressed – it could lead to Analyst personalities being seen as unapproachable or difficult to work with, potentially limiting their career growth, hindering their ability to collaborate, or making it difficult to build a network effectively.

To overcome this, Analyst personalities can consciously inject emotional awareness into their communication. This might mean starting video calls with brief personal check-ins, acknowledging others’ feelings in written responses, or explicitly stating their positive intent when delivering direct feedback.

Tip: Create a personal “emotional check-in” checklist. Keep this checklist visible during video calls, or reference it when composing messages. To create the checklist, take note of personal observations or questions that come up in meetings and emails (e.g., “Alex mentioned a challenging project last week – follow up on progress” or “Jane’s team won the semifinals – send good luck note for final game”), and set a goal to follow up with at least three coworkers per week.

Key Takeaway: Analysts can build stronger, more resilient professional relationships in remote work environments by integrating emotional awareness with their natural analytical abilities.

Diplomats: The Pitfalls of Too Much Empathy in Virtual Spaces

The Diplomat Role includes INFJ (Advocate), INFP (Mediator), ENFJ (Protagonist), and ENFP (Campaigner) personality types. Diplomats share the Intuitive and Feeling personality traits.

Diplomats often excel at building relationships, thanks to their natural empathy and people skills. In the remote workspace, however, these strengths can become double-edged swords. The challenge for Diplomats is striking a balance between their innate understanding of others and the need for clear, assertive communication in digital spaces.

In remote work settings, Diplomats’ tendency to overempathize can manifest differently depending on the mode of communication. In written exchanges, they might spend excessive time trying to interpret the emotional intent behind every message or email that they receive. During video calls, their heightened sensitivity to facial expressions and tone of voice might lead them to overanalyze subtle changes in their colleagues’ demeanor or tone.

This can lead to overthinking and, paradoxically, misunderstandings. For instance, a Diplomat might interpret a delayed response to an email as a sign of annoyance or disinterest, when in reality, the recipient was simply busy with other tasks.

Moreover, the desire to maintain harmony can sometimes hinder Diplomats’ ability to express disagreement or provide constructive criticism in virtual settings. In written communication, nuance can be lost, while in videoconferencing and calls, the fear of immediate negative reactions might lead Diplomats to water down their messages.

This can result in unclear communication, missed opportunities for feedback, and potentially, a lack of respect for Diplomats’ opinions over time. Diplomats might be seen as indecisive or overly cautious, rather than the empathetic leaders they have the potential to be.

There are strategies that Diplomat personalities can experiment with to maintain their empathetic approach while also communicating clearly. For example, they could commit to a “mindful assertiveness” approach to present alternative viewpoints in a comfortable way.

Tip: Practice “mindful assertiveness” by setting a personal goal to voice one clear, direct opinion in each meeting or significant written exchange. It’s okay to start small – perhaps by expressing a preference about project timing or offering a constructive suggestion about a new process.

Key Takeaway: Diplomats can create deep, meaningful connections in the virtual workplace by leveraging their emotional intelligence while developing more direct communication skills.

Sentinels: Balancing Structure and Flexibility in Virtual Spaces

The Sentinel Role includes ISTJ (Logistician), ISFJ (Defender), ESTJ (Executive), and ESFJ (Consul) personality types. Sentinels share the Observant and Judging personality traits.

Sentinels are often known for their reliability, attention to detail, preference for structure, and focus on common goals. In traditional office settings, these qualities make them invaluable team members who keep projects on track and ensure that deadlines are met.

However, remote work tends to be a bit more unpredictable. Sentinels may find that their usual approach requires a new level of flexibility. A chat message or video call can pop up at any time. These personalities might struggle to adjust to last-minute changes or the varying work rhythms of their remote colleagues. The resulting frustration, anxiety, or stress can create cracks in the otherwise strong foundation of their work.

Without their familiar routines and in-person interactions, Sentinels might feel lost. Trying to stick to a rigid plan or schedule might not work as well in the fluid environment of virtual work.

However, this aspect of remote work also provides a benefit to Sentinels. They can develop their adaptability by intentionally adding controlled chaos to their structured virtual routines. This might sound counterintuitive, but it’s a powerful way for Sentinels to stretch their comfort zone and enhance their professional skills.

These personalities can leave pockets of unstructured time in their schedule to encourage spontaneous collaboration or creative thinking. This approach not only helps in adapting to the inevitable disruptions of remote work but also in strengthening team bonds through more natural, unplanned interactions. One practical way that Sentinels can achieve this is by establishing “buffer zones” in their weekly schedule.

Tip: Establish “buffer zones” – small blocks of flexible time between structured tasks. Use these 15- to 30-minute windows to adapt your schedule to unexpected calls, respond to urgent messages, or simply take a few moments to engage in brief, meaningful exchanges with colleagues. Whether it’s arriving early to a video call for casual conversation or staying on for a quick follow-up chat, these exchanges provide small moments of valuable connection.

Key Takeaway: Sentinels’ ability to create structure amid uncertainty makes them invaluable in fostering stable yet adaptable professional relationships in the digital workspace.

Explorers: Finding Depth in a World of Constant Stimulation

The Explorer Role includes ISTP (Virtuoso), ISFP (Adventurer), ESTP (Entrepreneur), and ESFP (Entertainer) personality types. Explorers share the Observant and Prospecting personality traits.

Explorers thrive on variety, hands-on experiences, and living in the moment. These personalities tend to excel at thinking on their feet, adapting to changing situations, and bringing energy to team interactions.

However, with remote work, everything seems to happen through a screen, which can make Explorers feel like a fish out of water. The physical confinement of staying in one room and the lack of spontaneous, in-person interactions can feel stifling. The constant stream of meetings, emails, video calls, and notifications can be overwhelming yet at the same time monotonous, and these personalities may struggle with the absence of the real-world experiences that typically fuel their creativity and engagement.

The challenge for these personality types is finding depth and meaningful connections in an environment that can feel both overstimulating and oddly disconnected. Contrary to what one might expect, the key for Explorers might be to embrace moments of focus and depth.

This focused approach, when applied to collaborative work, creates opportunities for more meaningful connections with colleagues. Whether it’s diving deep into a challenging project with a teammate, engaging in concentrated problem-solving sessions, or sharing expertise through focused workshops, these deeper interactions can help Explorers forge stronger relationships at work.

The sense of accomplishment after a successful deep dive can be as exhilarating as any in-person engagement, not just by providing a new source of energy and excitement but also by creating shared experiences that strengthen professional relationships. By alternating periods of intense collaborative work with more casual team interactions, Explorers can create a rhythm that satisfies their need for stimulation, their desire for meaningful connections, and the demands of remote work. One way for Explorers to satisfy those needs would be to try out “Deep Dive Days.”

Tip: Establish personal “Deep Dive Days.” On these days, commit to focusing intensely on a single project or skill, often in partnership with a colleague or small team. By sharing your progress and insights from these deep dives with your colleagues, you can create meaningful talking points that go beyond surface-level chat and showcase your ability to bring fresh perspectives to the team.

Key Takeaway: Explorers’ ability to bring a sense of adventure to the digital workspace can invigorate team dynamics and lead to rich, engaging professional relationships.

Embracing Discomfort to Strengthen Virtual Work Relationships

As we’ve explored some of the nuances of building professional relationships in remote settings, one theme emerges: Embracing discomfort can be a powerful catalyst for growth and interpersonal connection.

The virtual workplace, with all its challenges, offers a unique opportunity to redefine how we connect professionally. By leaning into the discomfort of different, potentially unfamiliar ways of interacting, we open ourselves up to richer, more diverse work and business relationships that transcend physical boundaries.

Building relationships in a virtual environment is not about replicating in-person interactions. It’s about leveraging the distinct aspects of digital communication to create connections that are just as meaningful, if not more so, than traditional face-to-face relationships.

So the next time you feel the urge to shy away from that video call or hesitate before sharing a personal anecdote in a team chat, remind yourself that these moments of discomfort are opportunities for growth. Embrace them, learn from them, and use them to build professional relationships that are resilient, diverse, and truly global.

Think of a connection that you’ve established virtually that surprised you. What made it work? Was there a moment of discomfort that led to a breakthrough? Share your story in the comments below – your experience could be the inspiration that someone else needs to transform their virtual professional network.

And be sure to watch this space for more articles in our series on how different personality types can build strong professional relationships through remote work: