So Your Boss Is an ENFJ: Thriving Under the Weight of a Well-Intentioned Leadership Style

Working for an ENFJ boss can come with some challenges. But by understanding how their personality type influences their leadership style, you can learn how to deal with your difficult boss more effectively and transform your frustrations into opportunities for professional growth.

At their best, people with the ENFJ personality type (Protagonists) have a vision and charisma that can inspire – especially when they are in positions of authority. At their worst, they can be demanding, overly idealistic taskmasters who may leave their team members feeling drained and inadequate. If you’ve ever found yourself struggling under an ENFJ boss’s leadership style or feeling overwhelmed by their unrealistic expectations, you’re not alone.

In this article, we’ll explore the challenges of working with an ENFJ leader whose difficult behaviors might have you questioning whether your job is really right for you. More importantly, we’ll offer practical strategies for dealing with your difficult boss and turning your potential frustrations into opportunities for growth and personal development.

By understanding and adapting to your ENFJ boss’s unique leadership style, you can not just survive but thrive in your role. So let’s dive in.

Do you suspect that your boss is an ENFJ, but you aren’t sure? For a trait-by-trait description of difficult boss behaviors that can help you identify your boss’s personality type, check out our article “‘My Boss Hates Me!’: Personality and Difficult Leadership Styles.”

Understanding Your ENFJ Boss’s Leadership Style

If you want to deal with your difficult boss effectively, it helps to start from a place of understanding. More specifically, you must understand how their leadership style is directly shaped by their personality type.

Some ENFJs are natural-born leaders. Their Extraverted temperament allows them to effortlessly connect with, inspire, and motivate others. And the combination of their Intuitive and Feeling traits gives them a keen sense of others’ emotions and potential. These tendencies can help create a positive and energetic work environment where ENFJs use their Judging trait to organize their team around ambitious goals.

These traits can become problematic when out of balance, however. Because ENFJ bosses can see potential in everyone, they may build up unrealistic expectations about what their team members should be able to do. They might focus so intensely on social harmony that they allow unspoken issues to fester beneath a seemingly peaceful surface. And because of their underlying tendency for perfectionism, your ENFJ boss might struggle to delegate and may prefer to micromanage projects instead.

ENFJ bosses may also be sensitive to criticism, which can create an environment where team members feel uncomfortable providing honest, constructive feedback on projects and processes. Additionally, their strong emphasis on collaboration and teamwork can sometimes create frustrating inefficiencies in project execution. It can also lead them to fail to recognize that individuals sometimes need to work on their own.

Given these challenges, developing strategies to work with and manage your relationship with your ENFJ boss effectively is crucial. Let’s explore three key approaches that can help you navigate your boss’s unique leadership style and thrive in your role.

If this description doesn’t quite sound like your boss, check out our Workplace Type Guesser – an informal assessment tool that’s designed to help you make an educated guess about the personality types of your coworkers.

3 Strategies for Dealing With Your Difficult ENFJ Boss

To navigate the challenges of working with an ENFJ boss, it’s essential to consider their personality preferences and adapt your approach to work accordingly. Consider implementing the following three strategies.

Strategy #1: Engage in Proactive Communication

Effective communication is fundamental when working with an ENFJ boss, so don’t shy away from it. Use the following methods to be proactive in expressing your thoughts, ideas, and concerns:

Schedule regular one-on-one meetings.
Share your perspective on different projects.
Discuss setting some more realistic goals if you are feeling overwhelmed.
Approach difficult conversations with solutions in mind.

Remember, ENFJs value harmony. Chances are they want you to be happy in your job and within the team dynamic. So if you’re not happy, let them know what you need in the way that feels most comfortable to you.

If you’re an Introverted personality type or if you feel more reserved or hesitant about sharing your opinions, this strategy might feel uncomfortable – especially if you worry about offending your boss with feedback that they may perceive as critical. But by initiating open communication, you’ll demonstrate your commitment to a positive working relationship – an act that even the most difficult ENFJ boss will likely take note of and respect.

Strategy #2: Embrace Being a Team Player

ENFJs thrive in collaborative environments, but they may not understand that some people do not. Some people, especially those with the Introverted personality trait, would rather handle tasks independently. For them, expectations that they complete projects with others or that they be constantly available to their fellow teammates can feel frustrating. If you fall into this camp, accepting this aspect of work under an ENFJ boss is vital for your well-being in the workplace. Here are some ideas for how to embrace your role as a team player and show your commitment to the team’s success:

Proactively contribute to team projects.
Support colleagues when you can.
Demonstrate a strong work ethic and initiative.
Align your work with the team’s vision.

For more solitary workers, this strategy might feel like being asked to sacrifice a part of your identity. However, it can be done in a way that allows you to respect your individual preferences.

Consider applying the 80/20 rule to your approach to teamwork. Dedicate 80% of your focus and effort to your specific projects, but offer at least 20% of your time and energy to team collaboration in ways that feel comfortable to you. In the end, even that relatively small amount of time and energy that you dedicate to collaborative work will be a productive contribution to your team. Offer your help where relevant, volunteer if you know that you’d be a good fit for a project, and reach out to your ENFJ boss to discuss how your individual work can contribute to the greater good.

Embracing the team-focused nature of your boss’s leadership style, even if it’s only 20% of the time, can show your ENFJ boss that you are truly part of their team. It may also build trust and strengthen your working relationships – both with your boss and with your other colleagues.

Strategy #3: Seek Feedback and Guidance

ENFJs like to lead in a very human sense. They are often committed to helping their team members grow professionally, and this is frequently their underlying intent when they slip into micromanaging the people on their teams. By using the following techniques to proactively seek out your ENFJ boss’s feedback and guidance, you can harness their positive intentions to your benefit:

Schedule regular performance check-ins.
Ask for specific feedback on your work.
Seek advice on how to develop new skills.
Show appreciation for their input and implement their feedback.

Asking for feedback can be intimidating, especially for Feeling or Turbulent personalities, who are often more sensitive to criticism. However, remember that your ENFJ boss probably wants to support your growth. By seeking their guidance, you can show that you value their perspective and are committed to your own development. Approach these conversations with an open mind and a willingness to learn, and you may find that your ENFJ boss is an invaluable resource for your professional growth.

Not only that, but your receptivity to their input can help your boss develop a sense of trust in your capabilities, which could allow them to give you the space that you need to do your best work.

Check out our article “Personality and Effective Communication in the Workplace” to learn about how each personality trait influences your self-expression in a professional setting.

Final Thoughts

Navigating the complexities of any professional relationship requires effort, understanding, and adaptability – and this is especially true when you are dealing with a difficult boss. By implementing the strategies that we’ve outlined in this article, you’ll not only improve your work life but also contribute to a more productive and harmonious workplace for everyone.

Remember that you won’t be able to change your ENFJ boss’s personality-based approach to work, but you will need to adapt to it. The goal is to find common ground with them and leverage their strengths in a way that’s compatible with your personality preferences. With time, practice, and a shift in mindset, you may find that challenges that once seemed insufferable become opportunities for growth and collaboration.

We’d love to hear about your experiences working with your ENFJ boss. What unique challenges have you faced, and what strategies have worked best for you? We also invite our ENFJ readers who are in leadership positions to join the conversation. What insights can you offer from the other side of the desk? Leave your comments below to help create a dialogue that fosters understanding and improves workplace dynamics for everyone.